What Makes Us Happy?
By Farzaneh S. Khazrai, Ph.D.
fkhazrai@cox.net
In the last issue I presented the new trend of psychology named Positive Psychology. Historically, the knowledge of psychology has come about mainly from observing people with mental illness. Positive psychology is in fact the study of people who are mentally healthy. What qualities enable people, in spite of failures and setbacks in their lives, to bounce back with hopefulness and gratitude, and continue to achieve their goals and in the process, live more satisfying lives? Positive psychology has been trying to answer this question during the last two decades. I pointed to the three learned attitudes that can have profound effects negatively (learned helplessness) and positively (learned optimism) and learned hopefulness. I mentioned that positive psychology researchers have come up with a list of character strengths and virtues that have found to foster happiness, success and satisfaction in life.
One of the character strengths which has been the subject of many studies is gratitude. We can look at gratitude as an emotion, a behavior, or a personality trait. Gratitude (thankfulness or appreciation) is a positive emotion and attitude in acknowledgment of blessings one has or the benefit or help that one receives. As a behavior, gratitude is the expression of appreciation appropriately and effectively. With the start of the positive psychology movement, gratitude has become a focus of psychological research. As a result, a large body of research shows the mental health benefits of gratitude for people who give gratitude and those who receive it. Gratitude motivates people to do better in every aspect of their lives and promotes a closer and more satisfying relationship. Many personality traits are related to levels of mental health. However, studies show that gratitude is one of the few on the top of list of positive emotions/attitudes. Gratitude is an important personality trait that research has shown has one of the strongest links with mental health of any personality type.
Who is a Grateful Person?
Some recent researches have focused on gratitude as a personality characteristic. Some people generally feel much more gratitude than others, express gratitude more frequently, more intensely, and involve appreciation of a wider range of people and events. People who feel more gratitude in life are more likely to notice they have been helped, to respond appropriately, and to return the help as they can. A grateful person will express thanks and appreciation for things that many other people may take for granted or not even recognize as blessings in their lives. A grateful attitude and behavior creates a positive atmosphere in relation to others and as a result, positive feelings.
Gratitude is Different from Indebtedness.
Gratitude as a feeling is different from a feeling of indebtedness. Indebtedness occurs when one perceives that one is under an obligation to make some repayment of compensation for the help received. These two emotions motivate different actions. The indebtedness motivates the benefiters of the help to avoid the person who has helped him/her. The feeling of gratitude motivates the recipient to seek out their helper and to improve their relationship with them.
Gratitude and Well-Being
Studies suggest that people who feel more gratitude and express it more frequently have in general higher levels of well-being. Grateful people are happier, less depressed, less stressed, and more satisfied with their lives and social relationships. This is consistent with the conclusion of a series of research that people’s happiness could be predicted by the amount of gratitude they feel. Grateful people have higher levels of control of their environments, personal growth, purpose in life, and self acceptance. Grateful people have more positive ways of coping with the difficulties they experience in life. They are more likely to seek support from other people, and grow from the experience. They spend more time planning how to deal with the problem. Grateful people do not deny there is a problem and do not avoid problems. They look for solution with a grateful attitude for all their abilities. Grateful people generally are more relaxed and sleep better, and this seems to be because they think less negative but more positive thoughts just before going to sleep.
Grateful people will have better social relationships, characterized by greater closeness and more reciprocal social support. This results in better mental health, given the strong relationships between social support and physical and mental health. Gratitude works as a motivator of pro-social behavior in both helper and receiver of help. Thankfulness and appreciation of the help create such a positive satisfying emotion for both sides that motivates them to do more good for others.
"Gratitude is not only the greatest of the virtues, but the parent of all of the others"
Cicero (106–43BC)
"A noble person is mindful and thankful of the favors he receives from others"
The Buddha
I wish you deeper awakening to the blessings in your life and the ability to express your authentic gratitude to loved ones. Until the next issue, all the best!
